I am a mother of 4 children, boys ages 17 and 14, twin daughters that are about to turn 4. I am also a military wife and my husband is about to deploy for his third time to Afghanistan. I have severe chronic back pain and was referred to a pain mgt. doctor. Since Feb. of this year my dr gives me 120 percocet 5-325 a month. I am only supposed to take 4a day, but now I am totally abusing them. I take 12 a day (the max safely). I run out in a week and half. I am tired of living like this and tired of going through horrible painful withdrawals every month. Not to mention all the depression and obsession on how to get more percs. I am currently out of percocet and I am wanting to stay that way. I have never done anything illegal to obtain them, nor will I ever. I am just tired of living this way and seriously would rather die sometimes. Can someone please help!